Eat This, Clean That

Sometimes mom life feels like a series of 'lose-lose' choices. I want to be transparent here and let you know that the choices I make regarding my food and fitness impact my family life. Often, a choice to prep and pack food means that my house may stay a trash pit for the weekend. Granted, my small army of very tall children help with that, but they tend to help when pushed, not out of the goodness of their hearts.

I recently instituted some expectations regarding cleaning that have had some hilarious implementation issues.

Obviously, I have a way to go in getting things figured out. I have underlying clean, but visible clutter. Ugh. I seriously have to crop or retake to get all the dining room table junk out of my food pics.

Am I okay with the chaos? For now, yes. As I feel better, the house will get better. As I take care of myself, the house will be nicer by extension. As I set some boundaries, my children will better respect them.

I am modeling the need for wholeness and putting basic health needs first to my family, which can seem very counter to the Christian world I have grown up in which says we are to 'die to self'. I don't think they are the same thing, but many women have serious struggles with doing anything that resembles 'selfish-care' (sarcasm: I KNOW self-care is important.)

Not One Way: My Way is Not Your Way

image credit: LincolnGroup11

I've been feeling conflicted about putting up affiliate links to my Vemma Bode stuff, and I wanted to talk that out here a bit. I do not think there is just one way to eat. After trying dozens of plans, including Whole30, strict paleo, Eat to Perform, Medifast, Weight Watchers, HCG, blah blah blah, I decided I needed to take a step back and look at what had actually worked for ME. In the past couple decades, only one thing has worked relatively easily for me: Vemma Bode.

Now, is that because their product is magic? Nope. Do I believe there is one way to eat for everyone? Nope. Have I done a crazy amount of N=1 experimentation in my life? Yes.

Basically, I think there are reasons the Vemma stuff works for me. Not because of the product. If you are like me, it may help you. If you are not, it probably won't, and you should totally just skip over the links when you see them.

8 Reasons Why Bode Plan is My Way (for this season of life)

1. Eating 5 meals a day stabilizes my low blood sugar issues.
2. Drinking a shake within 30 minutes of waking is doable for my life- otherwise I skip.
3. Alternating low and high carb days keeps my wimpy thyroid functioning optimally.
4. Getting my multi-vitamin down in non-pill form. (I gag on pills... thus don't take them.)
5. Subbing Burn for Pepsi in the afternoon keeps me sane- it's fizzy and caffeinated. 
6. Following the plan means I'm rarely ever hungry, so I don't eat other junk when stressed. 
7. Having a total 'guilt-free' day is needed *mental* break each week- sustainability! 
8. Receiving digital reminders via the app keep me on track with meal timing when I'm busy. 
9. Focusing on protein and veggies keeps macros in line.

All in all, I could totally eat this program using clean, paleo approved foods. I could (and have tried) hunt down more whole food options to replace the shakes, etc. (Enter the tubs of Vega One in my pantry and SPN Sweet Potato Recovery Fuel in my cabinet.... purchased during my prior clean eating freakouts). It's not the product.

I am more interested in being consistent and sticking with something that works for me personally than I am in finding a perfect solution. I actually started down the path to crazyland this morning (read a few things on Facebook about clean eating which led to an internal crisis about my not clean diet which led me back to why I am doing this which led to this post). 

My overall advice- find what works for you. There is not one way to eat. Then tune everyone else out for a while and work your imperfect plan. Be accountable to someone for a 'time to re-evaluate date' and leave things alone until that time. There is not one way. There is your way- for your budget, schedule, and season of life.

Have you found what works for you? 

To Control My Body

I'm nearing the end of my first month back in the world of Crossfit. Tomorrow is my last 'Basics' class WOD... and I'm nervous. Why?

Not so much because of the increased work load to be found in the mainstream classes, but because of the mental battle that I know I will face in those classes. To be happy with myself. To not compare myself. To only do what my body can do at this point and time without pushing myself. To be present and content with the process and my location in this journey.

This morning our coach asked us what we wanted to get out of Crossfit beyond weight loss. I have to admit that the first thing I wrote was "to control my body".

Wrong answer.

I understand that this is a control and perfectionism issue- both of which are the genesis of many an eating disorder. Honestly, that is how I feel... I have fought this weight loss and fitness thing for decades, and I would just like to be able to *know* what will net me long-term results. I don't feel like I do right now. And I need to be okay with that.

For now, patience.
Releasing control.
Trusting the process.
Enjoying the journey.

(On a different note, Women's Health Magazine March 2014 is telling us that 40 is the new 20.... aren't you glad to hear it? And I promise I wasn't reading it... it was just sittin' here next to me on the table at the library. That kind of stuff I know isn't great for inspiring patience in this journey... did you see those headlines? Flat Abs NOW! Lose 5, 10, 15+ Pounds: Start Today.... blah blah blah No one wants to hear the reality.... Change Takes Time! Lose 15 pounds This Year! Flat Abs in 5 Years!)